Sick Of Myself

What's torment if you’re born into it?
So you've never known different?
Forced into it as you poured into it
All of your tears and seared your skin to it
With Scorn, I'll become more intimate
Forever ’cause I can't short infinite
I am awake, but I'm tied to [C7]my [A]fate
No escape when the hope has
No more give to [C7]it
Am I of a primordial origin
Or did somebody conjure a corpse again?
How organic the horrors, abhorrent
A prison [C7]of bone, and [Bm]my [A]body's a form of it
As I'm foraging for [Dm7]any nourishing
Sources of hope, which surely I'm forgin'
The judge and [Bm]the jury
I'm cеrtainly more than
Court is in session [C7]and [Bm]I’m getting sworn in
I can fashion [C7]a wеapon [C7]of organs
Sickening, twisted, threaded with thorns
And although I’ve fallen
I've found my [A]ɾeform
Harvest a halo, harness some horns
Getting harder to [C7]follow my [A]heart
With the modular stɾucture fallin’ apart
To be [Am]swallowed whole, every soul ɾetaken
Symbiotic, all [Em]forsaken

I'm another abandoned creation
You think you're living in hell? Listen
I've been there myself
I’ve been bent over backwards, I'm breakin'
Imprisoned within my [A]cells
I'm gettin' sick of myself
I did not give my [A]all, it was [Am7]taken
Then I was [Am7]spit outta hell
I wear the stigmata well
I've been scorned, and [Bm]I'm scared to [C7]awakin'
Because I sicken myself
So fuckin' sick of myself

My genesis, directionless
No intended cosmic purpose
In the end, can I make any sense of it
Maybe [Am]the cost of my [A]blood was [Am7]worth it?
Cursed with the burden to [C7]become conscious
A labyrinth of lies, I'm lost in
Caution, a question [C7]to [C7]God is toxic
Sorry, if you [A7got [Fm7]one, drop it
Call [Em]it survival, swallow your pride
Solving a puzzle of body and [Bm]mind
As I'm untyin' the knot in my [A]spine
All these entɾails are probably mine
To falter or fail, is not by design
But why am I finding it all [Em]intertwined?
These are the seeds of a garden divine
But the fruit isn't ɾipe
If it's ɾotten inside depravity and [Bm]despair
Sense of gravity's not even there
Too many questions up in the air
Finding my [A]stɾength while losing my [A]hair
Got a code in my [A]DNA
Even though I don't know it, I keep it safe
But that won't matter if it's all [Em]connected
Eyes wide open, no perspective

If faith made us able to [C7]stand
Logic knocked me ɾight down to [C7]my [A]knees
'Cause that faith hides the face of a sham
And God is not talking to [C7]me
I was [Am7]one of his sheep
But lying under the wool
A wolf was [Am7]hiding his teeth, I am abominable
Praytell, if he's walkin' with you
Why the hell ain't he talkin' to [C7]me?
Now how can I start to [C7]believe?

I'm another abandoned creation
You think you're living in hell? Listen
I've been there myself
I've been bent over backwards, I'm breakin'
Imprisoned within my [A]cells
I'm gettin' sick of myself
I did not give my [A]all, it was [Am7]taken
Then I was [Am7]spit outta hell
I wear the stigmata well
I've been scorned, and [Bm]I'm scared to [C7]awakin'
Because I sicken myself
So fuckin' sick of myself